Saturday, September 27, 2008
Bob Carpenter
It's been a while since I've posted or even been in touch with many of you, but I wanted to let you know that Bob Carpenter, Donna's husband and Jeff's step-father, recently lost his battle with cancer. Please keep him and Donna in you prayers.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
A Couple of Add-Ons
I got bored and started messing around with blogspot. I have added a counter at the bottom of the page. Mainly for my own curiosity. I always wonder how often people come here to see if any new posts have been put up. The second is the slideshow on the left. I unfortunately don't have a whole lot of pics of Jeff, but I put up the few I did. We can always add to it or change them all together.
With a year gone by, there isn't a day I don't think of Jeff. The night Jeff passed and I received the phone call at 1AM to come to the hospital, I stood in the driveway staring up at the stars for what seemed like an eternity. Ever since, every time I look up at the stars I think of him and wonder what should have been.
Till next time,
Tyson
With a year gone by, there isn't a day I don't think of Jeff. The night Jeff passed and I received the phone call at 1AM to come to the hospital, I stood in the driveway staring up at the stars for what seemed like an eternity. Ever since, every time I look up at the stars I think of him and wonder what should have been.
Till next time,
Tyson
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
This Past Year
Props to you, Michelle. You know I am proud of you. It is so easy to get stuck in ambivalence. However, losing someone close to our hearts makes us realize that we don't have forever to make things better for ourselves, we need to make our "now" everything it can be, not put all of our hopes into tomorrows we may not even have. This is one of the gifts we get from this pain.
Having both parents being diagnosed with cancer this past year since Jeff's passing was pretty tough. But then losing Dad after he had made it through chemo and radiation to complete remission really blindsided me. You wouldn't think that I could take days, months or years for granted with my career as an oncology nurse .... but somehow it just happens.
I love you all. I thank each of you that prayed for my family and me this year. I couldn't have done it without you "old school" friends that really stepped up to the plate.
Thanks again, Jeff, for managing to get all of us back together again. Still wish you could have been there. You'd have really dug the memorial.
We all need to get together again before we have to do it for another huge loss in our hearts. I am game for where/whenever.
Love,
Kerri Z
Having both parents being diagnosed with cancer this past year since Jeff's passing was pretty tough. But then losing Dad after he had made it through chemo and radiation to complete remission really blindsided me. You wouldn't think that I could take days, months or years for granted with my career as an oncology nurse .... but somehow it just happens.
I love you all. I thank each of you that prayed for my family and me this year. I couldn't have done it without you "old school" friends that really stepped up to the plate.
Thanks again, Jeff, for managing to get all of us back together again. Still wish you could have been there. You'd have really dug the memorial.
We all need to get together again before we have to do it for another huge loss in our hearts. I am game for where/whenever.
Love,
Kerri Z
Sunday, July 6, 2008
How many days have passed?
Hey all, as I sit here tonight, dwelling on time past, it dawns on me that almost a year has gone by. I can't even believe it. I still have Jeff's obituary sitting on my desk as if it were last week. My life has been in complete upheaval since Jeff's departure. I don't know how many of you know this but Jeff is in part responsible for the happiness that I experience today.
I told Kris that I was leaving him last July and found out almost simultaneously of Jeff's deteriorating condition. It was such a surreal time for me, trying to deal with both. In addition, I had so many people that I loved coming back in to my life after years of separation, both voluntary and involuntary. Some of you that I hold very dear and hadn't seen in so long came back in like a whirlwind, utter disregard for past differences or time spent apart as if not a day had passed. It was this horrifying yet sadly happy time in my life. Being back in Oklahoma made me realize that this is where I needed to be and Jeff gave me an excuse to come here in the first place.
I never went back to Oregon. I am back home, divorced, and happier than I have been in a very long time. My child has adjusted to two homes and her dad and I have both moved on. Life never ceases to amaze me. It isn't perfect. I don't get the pain. I don't understand the loss. I don't know how to explain to my three year old why things can be really super shitty but it is what it is and in every thing that is bad, there is always something good, even if it is just that our friend is in a better place...wherever that may be. I wonder daily but know that some day I will find out first hand. His smile was and still is infectious. I can see it in my mind and it brings a smile to my face as I type.
I love you all. You are amazing people. We are SO lucky. Which brings me to my next question....When are we getting together? Next month at Texoma??
Peace.
I told Kris that I was leaving him last July and found out almost simultaneously of Jeff's deteriorating condition. It was such a surreal time for me, trying to deal with both. In addition, I had so many people that I loved coming back in to my life after years of separation, both voluntary and involuntary. Some of you that I hold very dear and hadn't seen in so long came back in like a whirlwind, utter disregard for past differences or time spent apart as if not a day had passed. It was this horrifying yet sadly happy time in my life. Being back in Oklahoma made me realize that this is where I needed to be and Jeff gave me an excuse to come here in the first place.
I never went back to Oregon. I am back home, divorced, and happier than I have been in a very long time. My child has adjusted to two homes and her dad and I have both moved on. Life never ceases to amaze me. It isn't perfect. I don't get the pain. I don't understand the loss. I don't know how to explain to my three year old why things can be really super shitty but it is what it is and in every thing that is bad, there is always something good, even if it is just that our friend is in a better place...wherever that may be. I wonder daily but know that some day I will find out first hand. His smile was and still is infectious. I can see it in my mind and it brings a smile to my face as I type.
I love you all. You are amazing people. We are SO lucky. Which brings me to my next question....When are we getting together? Next month at Texoma??
Peace.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Need your Addresses
Hi everyone,
The DVD will be ready soon. Please send me your snail mail addresses and I'll get it to you as soon as I'm done.
Matt
Originally posted 1-15-08
Man, that snail mail is really slowwwwwwwwwwwww.
The DVD will be ready soon. Please send me your snail mail addresses and I'll get it to you as soon as I'm done.
Matt
Originally posted 1-15-08
Man, that snail mail is really slowwwwwwwwwwwww.
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Friday, February 15, 2008
Monday, January 28, 2008
More to say...as Jeff's sister
Today my heart has been more grateful and less sorrowful as I think about all of the lives Jeff touched.
There are so many people that I want to thank just because I am so grateful. Everyone who has participated on this website - thank you, Jeff would have dug this.
Everyone that attended the memorial in honor of Jeff - thank you for showing up, I think that Jeff was happy to see you there.
To all of Jeff's friends in Colorado, especially Kay, thank you for remembering Jeff. He spoke of you often. I know you all had a really great time together.
For everyone in NYC that supported Jeff and his family thank you. This includes his coworkers at Lehman Brothers and the many friends that he made there.
There are many people that I haven't thought to thank but I am pretty tenacious and if it comes to me I will!
There are so many people that I want to thank just because I am so grateful. Everyone who has participated on this website - thank you, Jeff would have dug this.
Everyone that attended the memorial in honor of Jeff - thank you for showing up, I think that Jeff was happy to see you there.
To all of Jeff's friends in Colorado, especially Kay, thank you for remembering Jeff. He spoke of you often. I know you all had a really great time together.
For everyone in NYC that supported Jeff and his family thank you. This includes his coworkers at Lehman Brothers and the many friends that he made there.
There are many people that I haven't thought to thank but I am pretty tenacious and if it comes to me I will!
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Happy Birthday Jeff
Jeff – Happy Birthday!
Your love is a gift that energizes the planet. There are so many humans that are blessed by your friendship and are grateful today that they know you.
For the last thirty-three years my life has been shared with yours. One of my first childhood memories is of visiting you in the hospital the day you were born. Dad held me on his shoulders so that I could watch you sleeping behind the glass. I remember shaking with excitement.
As children I remember wrestling on the ground, our parents warning me that some day you might actually be stronger than me and of course one day you were and the wrestling ceased, of course. I remember the day you were actually taller than me too.
As a teenager I was pretty lost. I had no direction to offer you and there are some things that we shared that I wish we didn’t have to; but, thank God we got to talk about everything that went on back then there are no regrets.
As young adults, you amazed me with your fearless spirit. Surrounded by friends and comrades you traveled, studied, snowboarded, appreciated music and had a great time. You were able to set goals and accomplish them; you were unwilling to settle for mediocrity.
After graduating from CU in Boulder, CO you moved to New York City and you told me that you still wanted to work on Wall Street and that you really wanted a family. Of course, you got everything that you wanted there. You met your life partner and got an awesome job on Wall Street. You even had a beautiful baby boy. I was so happy for you as I watched all of your dreams come true.
As adults we became close friends. We relived our lives together over lengthy phone conversations. We continued to share our feelings and our hopes in an increasingly open way. We would find ourselves on the phone for an hour at a time. You are so easy to talk to.
Since your transition the tears that I have shed astound me. Knowing that the grief that I experience is simply a manifestation of the love in my heart is of some comfort but it doesn’t bring you back. I wish that you were still here because I know that you wanted more than anything to raise your son. You took such pride in your role as a father. I remember you saying that last Father’s Day was the best day of your life. Thank you Sarah for making that happen.
I can only speak for myself – but it has been difficult to look back on the times when you were sick. I appreciated Travis so much for being there with Jeff in the hospital by his side and for writing the way that he did about Jeff’s last days. I wish that it were still posted. Travis is an awesome friend. Thank you Travis.
Jeff has so many close friends (Pat, Nathan, Mike R., Tyson) were among his closest in OKC and were there for him in the hospital. Thank you.
He considered Matt McCaffree his brother who was there for him in countless ways. Now I consider Matt my brother too. Thank you for all of the phone conversations and support.
Thank you Sara McCaffree (Saffree) for getting this going, you were my best friend in elementary school and I still love you. Thank you for the support and love you have extended to me and my family.
Thank you to Dr.’s Bob and Mary Anne McCaffree for having the lovely memorial party and for being there for my family in the hospital and at home during our most difficult hours.
Thank you Mom for sharing your cancer support information with me so that I didn’t have to grieve alone. We are not alone.
Thank you Mom and Dad for encouraging the relationships that I have with my siblings. Thank you for teaching me to value them. What a precious, precious gift you gave the world when you participated in the creation of Jeffrey Donald. Thank you.
Your love is a gift that energizes the planet. There are so many humans that are blessed by your friendship and are grateful today that they know you.
For the last thirty-three years my life has been shared with yours. One of my first childhood memories is of visiting you in the hospital the day you were born. Dad held me on his shoulders so that I could watch you sleeping behind the glass. I remember shaking with excitement.
As children I remember wrestling on the ground, our parents warning me that some day you might actually be stronger than me and of course one day you were and the wrestling ceased, of course. I remember the day you were actually taller than me too.
As a teenager I was pretty lost. I had no direction to offer you and there are some things that we shared that I wish we didn’t have to; but, thank God we got to talk about everything that went on back then there are no regrets.
As young adults, you amazed me with your fearless spirit. Surrounded by friends and comrades you traveled, studied, snowboarded, appreciated music and had a great time. You were able to set goals and accomplish them; you were unwilling to settle for mediocrity.
After graduating from CU in Boulder, CO you moved to New York City and you told me that you still wanted to work on Wall Street and that you really wanted a family. Of course, you got everything that you wanted there. You met your life partner and got an awesome job on Wall Street. You even had a beautiful baby boy. I was so happy for you as I watched all of your dreams come true.
As adults we became close friends. We relived our lives together over lengthy phone conversations. We continued to share our feelings and our hopes in an increasingly open way. We would find ourselves on the phone for an hour at a time. You are so easy to talk to.
Since your transition the tears that I have shed astound me. Knowing that the grief that I experience is simply a manifestation of the love in my heart is of some comfort but it doesn’t bring you back. I wish that you were still here because I know that you wanted more than anything to raise your son. You took such pride in your role as a father. I remember you saying that last Father’s Day was the best day of your life. Thank you Sarah for making that happen.
I can only speak for myself – but it has been difficult to look back on the times when you were sick. I appreciated Travis so much for being there with Jeff in the hospital by his side and for writing the way that he did about Jeff’s last days. I wish that it were still posted. Travis is an awesome friend. Thank you Travis.
Jeff has so many close friends (Pat, Nathan, Mike R., Tyson) were among his closest in OKC and were there for him in the hospital. Thank you.
He considered Matt McCaffree his brother who was there for him in countless ways. Now I consider Matt my brother too. Thank you for all of the phone conversations and support.
Thank you Sara McCaffree (Saffree) for getting this going, you were my best friend in elementary school and I still love you. Thank you for the support and love you have extended to me and my family.
Thank you to Dr.’s Bob and Mary Anne McCaffree for having the lovely memorial party and for being there for my family in the hospital and at home during our most difficult hours.
Thank you Mom for sharing your cancer support information with me so that I didn’t have to grieve alone. We are not alone.
Thank you Mom and Dad for encouraging the relationships that I have with my siblings. Thank you for teaching me to value them. What a precious, precious gift you gave the world when you participated in the creation of Jeffrey Donald. Thank you.
January 27, 2008
Today would have been Jeff's 33rd birthday and an almost constant reminder has been running through my head this week. One impulse is to treat it like a solemn experience and to think about what Jeff meant to me, all of the wonderful experiences we shared and our time together. Another, which I'm going to try today, is to use this day to look forward while being mindful of the lessons I learned through our friendship.
My day is pretty simple - go for a ride and make dinner for some friends - but these are simple things that I don't make the time for often enough. I hope some of you can take the time to focus on what's valuable to you and let the people close to you know how important they are.
Thank you all for your friendship.
My day is pretty simple - go for a ride and make dinner for some friends - but these are simple things that I don't make the time for often enough. I hope some of you can take the time to focus on what's valuable to you and let the people close to you know how important they are.
Thank you all for your friendship.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Need Your Addresses
Hi everyone,
The DVD will be ready soon. Please send me your snail mail addresses and I'll get it to you as soon as I'm done.
Matt
The DVD will be ready soon. Please send me your snail mail addresses and I'll get it to you as soon as I'm done.
Matt
Friday, December 21, 2007
From Jeff's Mom
Donna sent an e-mail out, but didn't have everyone's e-mail and asked for us to pass it on.
I wanted to express a Merry Xmas to all of you and to let you know that I have been thinking about you. I am so grateful that Jeff had such great friends as you were to him. He truly cherished each of you, I know that you are aware of how much you meant to him. He was here last year and it was the best Xmas that we had ever had. He and Sarah and August were here as well as the rest of our family. I am so glad that Jeff had the time with us, then. Peace be with all of you. love, donna
I wanted to express a Merry Xmas to all of you and to let you know that I have been thinking about you. I am so grateful that Jeff had such great friends as you were to him. He truly cherished each of you, I know that you are aware of how much you meant to him. He was here last year and it was the best Xmas that we had ever had. He and Sarah and August were here as well as the rest of our family. I am so glad that Jeff had the time with us, then. Peace be with all of you. love, donna
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Xmas wishes
I'm sorry I won't be in town to see all of you. I hope you have a great time catching up!
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Happy Birthday August, Sarah and Matt!!
Wow, what a busy month with lots to celebrate! Hope you all have/had (sorry A and M, I'm a little late) a wonderful day filled with hope, joy, love and laughter. Well wishes to you all,
Lia
Lia
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Happy Thanksgiving
Just wanted to wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving.
Sarah, I will be thinking of you and August especially. I wish you a peaceful day with a heart full of memories of Jeff and a slew of new memories with your beautiful little boy.
Love,
Kerri
Sarah, I will be thinking of you and August especially. I wish you a peaceful day with a heart full of memories of Jeff and a slew of new memories with your beautiful little boy.
Love,
Kerri
Monday, November 5, 2007
Holidays
With the holidays steadily approaching, I was just thinking that a lot of people would be in OKC to celebrate with family. Let's try to get our "family" together at some point over the holidays. Any ideas, dates, suggestions and availability would be greatly appreciated.
~Kerri
~Kerri
Monday, October 29, 2007
Beaver Creek Request
Hi Guys,
Could you please RSVP for this event ASAP. I need to know by the end of the week where you stand. Thanks.
(212) 920-5706
Could you please RSVP for this event ASAP. I need to know by the end of the week where you stand. Thanks.
(212) 920-5706
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Beaver Creek get together
Wish I could be there! While everyone is there, please keep Augustine in your thoughts. His second birthday is Dec. 2 (the same day as Matt's).
xox
xox
Two Quickies....
Matt.....What is the dealeo with the DVD? Any updates?
Secondly....What happened to the other blog?
Secondly....What happened to the other blog?
Friday, October 19, 2007
The Wife ...
I read your blog as well, Sarah. It was amazing to "sit through" all of those intimate moments with you and Jeff. I am always on the other side of the door as the oncology nurse. I will never again ask "And who are you?" the same way again. Thank you so much for sharing your stream of consciousness so honestly and openly. It will affect me daily as I hold the hands of people facing cancer.
And Lia, our family has a time share that sleeps 12 comfortably as well. It is in Eagle. I am so Colorado confused. I never know how far I am from where! Is that close to where you will be? I'd love to offer even more accomodations!
And, everyone, please do me a favor and keep Dad Zehrung in your prayers. Dad was diagnosed with cancer this summer and has been fighting as best he can but he received some tough news today and needs some positive vibes. His body has been through a lot these last few years and he needs all of the help he can get to face this. Say some prayers for Mom Zehrung, too. She is taking care of him (I won't use 'caretaker' just for Sarah) but needs to take care of herself as well.
My little guy turned one this week. Can't believe it has been a year! Time really does fly.
More soon. Peace and love to all.
~Kerri Z Hill
And Lia, our family has a time share that sleeps 12 comfortably as well. It is in Eagle. I am so Colorado confused. I never know how far I am from where! Is that close to where you will be? I'd love to offer even more accomodations!
And, everyone, please do me a favor and keep Dad Zehrung in your prayers. Dad was diagnosed with cancer this summer and has been fighting as best he can but he received some tough news today and needs some positive vibes. His body has been through a lot these last few years and he needs all of the help he can get to face this. Say some prayers for Mom Zehrung, too. She is taking care of him (I won't use 'caretaker' just for Sarah) but needs to take care of herself as well.
My little guy turned one this week. Can't believe it has been a year! Time really does fly.
More soon. Peace and love to all.
~Kerri Z Hill
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Beaver Creek 2007!!
Hello all snow fans!
The time for a celebratory memorial Beaver Creek reunion is here and it starts Saturday December 1st, 2007 and will last till Saturday the 8th.
What you need to know: My family has a time share in Beaver Creek that sleeps 12 comfortably, we have, and can get much cozier with more people and it all works out quite well. There are 4 bathrooms, a washer/dryer, full kitchen, fireplace, steam room and sauna, and, and, and, a hot tub!! Oh yea, and the best skiing in Colorado. (tho I know them's are fightin' words)
Tickets from NYC right now are about $525 RT, it is usually more time efficient and less stressful to just fly into EGE, Eagle county airport. You can ride the CME, Colorado Mountain Express, which runs every hour on the hour from Denver, but that costs $75 per person each way and for $150 you can fly into Eagle, save time and be picked up yours truly. If you want to drive from Denver there will be people driving up, my friend Kendal and Mike Harmon are the first two I know of as of yet and both have offered ride services, so if you want to coordinate a ride let me know and I'll put you in touch.
Lift tickets are about $72 a day and board rentals about $30 or so.
Cost for the condo will vary on how many people come and for how long. The place itself, I offer to you for free, you have to pay nothing for a fabulously comfortable place to sleep, but group groceries, gas, booze, and 1 car rental are divided amongst the group and we try to eat most our meals at home to save $.
Children are more than welcome, but I don't have a child safe bed so we will have to make accomodations, let me know asap, I think we can rent one from the front desk. There are two private bedrooms, so peeps with kids can have these rooms. Beaver Creek mountain is great place to learn to ski/snowboard with professional instructors for all levels, as well as babysitting services and kiddie day care. There is sledding, snowshoeing and all other types of snow activities available.
Here is the link for Beaver Creek Mountain for any other details you might need, like checking the snow base. Oh yea, Beaver Creek has a snowboard park!!
http://beavercreek.snow.com/winterhome.asp
Vail is right around the corner, we go into town for music, food and shopping, so if you don't like snow activities there is still plenty for you to do.
I'm sure I forgot something, don't hesitate to ask. Oh, you don't have to come all week long, just for a weekend if that works better for you. Also, I lost my cell phone, could you email me your number? Does anyone know how to get in touch with Laura and Dave?
I have my ticket already and a confirmation from Harmon and Tommy. I really hope to see many of you make it out. I know it's hard with expenses, family and time constraints, but what I do know is that travel with my friends makes me the happiest I ever am. I have truly awesome memories of the times I have spent in Beaver Creek with Jeff, Harmon, Roberts and Matt and the revolving group of people who have been smart enough to make it out over the past 15 plus years. Please come shred some snow with me as I remember and celebrate Jeff in the best way I know how.
The time for a celebratory memorial Beaver Creek reunion is here and it starts Saturday December 1st, 2007 and will last till Saturday the 8th.
What you need to know: My family has a time share in Beaver Creek that sleeps 12 comfortably, we have, and can get much cozier with more people and it all works out quite well. There are 4 bathrooms, a washer/dryer, full kitchen, fireplace, steam room and sauna, and, and, and, a hot tub!! Oh yea, and the best skiing in Colorado. (tho I know them's are fightin' words)
Tickets from NYC right now are about $525 RT, it is usually more time efficient and less stressful to just fly into EGE, Eagle county airport. You can ride the CME, Colorado Mountain Express, which runs every hour on the hour from Denver, but that costs $75 per person each way and for $150 you can fly into Eagle, save time and be picked up yours truly. If you want to drive from Denver there will be people driving up, my friend Kendal and Mike Harmon are the first two I know of as of yet and both have offered ride services, so if you want to coordinate a ride let me know and I'll put you in touch.
Lift tickets are about $72 a day and board rentals about $30 or so.
Cost for the condo will vary on how many people come and for how long. The place itself, I offer to you for free, you have to pay nothing for a fabulously comfortable place to sleep, but group groceries, gas, booze, and 1 car rental are divided amongst the group and we try to eat most our meals at home to save $.
Children are more than welcome, but I don't have a child safe bed so we will have to make accomodations, let me know asap, I think we can rent one from the front desk. There are two private bedrooms, so peeps with kids can have these rooms. Beaver Creek mountain is great place to learn to ski/snowboard with professional instructors for all levels, as well as babysitting services and kiddie day care. There is sledding, snowshoeing and all other types of snow activities available.
Here is the link for Beaver Creek Mountain for any other details you might need, like checking the snow base. Oh yea, Beaver Creek has a snowboard park!!
http://beavercreek.snow.com/winterhome.asp
Vail is right around the corner, we go into town for music, food and shopping, so if you don't like snow activities there is still plenty for you to do.
I'm sure I forgot something, don't hesitate to ask. Oh, you don't have to come all week long, just for a weekend if that works better for you. Also, I lost my cell phone, could you email me your number? Does anyone know how to get in touch with Laura and Dave?
I have my ticket already and a confirmation from Harmon and Tommy. I really hope to see many of you make it out. I know it's hard with expenses, family and time constraints, but what I do know is that travel with my friends makes me the happiest I ever am. I have truly awesome memories of the times I have spent in Beaver Creek with Jeff, Harmon, Roberts and Matt and the revolving group of people who have been smart enough to make it out over the past 15 plus years. Please come shred some snow with me as I remember and celebrate Jeff in the best way I know how.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Nightline
Did any of you see the Nightline episode about young adults facing cancer a few weeks back? Here's a link to an article about it http://www.abcnews.go.com/Nightline/Story?id=3623642&page=2 It was tough to see but it shed light on something I didn't know- young adult cancer survival rates haven't improved at all in the last 50 years while survival rates for kids and older patients have improved drastically. That seems so CRAZY! If you're interested, check it out.
I talked to Shabo in Crested Butte a couple weeks ago, and he sends regards to everyone. We talked about creating a memorial plaque or something along that line in CB. Just something to think about.
Hope everyone is doing well and that everyone is NOT as busy as me. Sunday, for example, is my first marathon and the Rockies' playoff game!
Later skaters, I'll tell you how much the running sucked next week! Oh, and if anyone would like a copy of the CD that I made for Jeff's memorial, just send me your snail address.
JJ
I talked to Shabo in Crested Butte a couple weeks ago, and he sends regards to everyone. We talked about creating a memorial plaque or something along that line in CB. Just something to think about.
Hope everyone is doing well and that everyone is NOT as busy as me. Sunday, for example, is my first marathon and the Rockies' playoff game!
Later skaters, I'll tell you how much the running sucked next week! Oh, and if anyone would like a copy of the CD that I made for Jeff's memorial, just send me your snail address.
JJ
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
It's a small world, after all.
So I went to LA for the weekend for a friend's birthday. Yes, THE weekend - OU Texas. My friend dropped me off at a local watering hole called Barney's Beanery, where I settled in to watch the game. Unfortunately, I settled WAY too close to a USC fan (grr! hate them! SO GLAD THEY LOST TO STANFORD! haha) who proceeded to get verbally abusive, so I wandered towards where some friendly Sooner clapping was coming from. "Are you a Sooners fan?" "Yes," he said. "Are you from Oklahoma?" "Yep." "Where?" Oklahoma City." "Wow - me too - where in OKC?" "The south side." "Where did you go to high school?"
"Mount St. Mary's."
(oh god) "...when did you graduate?"
"1997 [a sigh of relief from me] - no wait, that's when I graduated from college." Heart dropping.
That's right - I met a classmate of Jeff's. Of all the sports bars in all the cities in all the world...! Lucas Flanagan, if you're reading this - hello! I have to say it was a bit shocking. When I brought up Jeff he said "I heard" and I forced the poor guy into a hug. Thank goodness for Okie good manners. It was so nice to have a reminder that Jeff is still living around and among us, creating all these amazing connections.
One of Jeff's other classmates is somehow involved in school activities - I can't remember exactly how. I could be incorrect in repeating the following, but supposedly there has been some discussion about how many people have passed from cancer in his class and if there's anything that can be done. There's a chance that I heard that someone else needs to get sick in order to really move forward, but again, I could be incorrect about that.
I have to say, it was nice getting a nudge from Jeff in that bar with all the horrible people - of course, Jeff, of all people, would know someone there!
"Mount St. Mary's."
(oh god) "...when did you graduate?"
"1997 [a sigh of relief from me] - no wait, that's when I graduated from college." Heart dropping.
That's right - I met a classmate of Jeff's. Of all the sports bars in all the cities in all the world...! Lucas Flanagan, if you're reading this - hello! I have to say it was a bit shocking. When I brought up Jeff he said "I heard" and I forced the poor guy into a hug. Thank goodness for Okie good manners. It was so nice to have a reminder that Jeff is still living around and among us, creating all these amazing connections.
One of Jeff's other classmates is somehow involved in school activities - I can't remember exactly how. I could be incorrect in repeating the following, but supposedly there has been some discussion about how many people have passed from cancer in his class and if there's anything that can be done. There's a chance that I heard that someone else needs to get sick in order to really move forward, but again, I could be incorrect about that.
I have to say, it was nice getting a nudge from Jeff in that bar with all the horrible people - of course, Jeff, of all people, would know someone there!
Thursday, October 4, 2007
the wife
Hey Sarah.... I'm glad to see that you have joined this group (that never posts). I clicked on your name and saw your other post about the last few months. I can't begin to tell you how thankful I am that you shared those posts. It was also very difficult to sit there and read what all was going along and how Jeff's cancer was progressing, knowing that he would no longer be with us a few short months after thoses posts were written. It's like watching a re-run that you know the ending to.
Ending......hmmm. It's interesting how I sit here staring at that word. How can I call it the end, when in fact Jeff is still very active in my life and everyone else on this blog. He's here with me now as I'm writing this non-directional post. I can't say a day hasn't gone by that I haven't thought about Jeff looking down and I think, what would Jeff want me to do in this situation. Am I acting as a good person from Jeff's perspective or is he too busy kicking it with the "fat" man (Jerry Garcia).
I think the best part about your posts, are how your day to day lives went while going through this completely fucked up situation. My absolute favorite paragraph is when you are talking about your first Christmas together. My wife and I went through the exact same thing. She was driving herself completely insane by trying to go out and find the absolute perfect gifts for me. You know the ones that when opened, would be accompanied by angels coming down to sing Hallelujah and have lights shining so brightly behind me that she would barely be able to make out my face. At the same time she thought that since we had been together for a year and a half that I should know exactly how her mind worked and would be able to read her so well that I would find the gift that she didn't even know she wanted, but also couldn't see living the rest of her life without it. Ahh, yeah right. The gifts she got me, I can't even remeber and hers, well, it was returned to the store a few days later because she had never wanted it to begin with. But, it was our first really special holiday together and it will always be the most special time I will remember.
I apologive for not calling you or Rex, but I'm never sure what to say. God knows I've thought about calling you guys a hundred times. I think about you, A-Rex and Rex everyday. I hope you and August decide to stick around Oklahoma for awhile and maybe discover a little more about Jeff that you didn't know.
Hope to see you guys soon,
Tyson
Ending......hmmm. It's interesting how I sit here staring at that word. How can I call it the end, when in fact Jeff is still very active in my life and everyone else on this blog. He's here with me now as I'm writing this non-directional post. I can't say a day hasn't gone by that I haven't thought about Jeff looking down and I think, what would Jeff want me to do in this situation. Am I acting as a good person from Jeff's perspective or is he too busy kicking it with the "fat" man (Jerry Garcia).
I think the best part about your posts, are how your day to day lives went while going through this completely fucked up situation. My absolute favorite paragraph is when you are talking about your first Christmas together. My wife and I went through the exact same thing. She was driving herself completely insane by trying to go out and find the absolute perfect gifts for me. You know the ones that when opened, would be accompanied by angels coming down to sing Hallelujah and have lights shining so brightly behind me that she would barely be able to make out my face. At the same time she thought that since we had been together for a year and a half that I should know exactly how her mind worked and would be able to read her so well that I would find the gift that she didn't even know she wanted, but also couldn't see living the rest of her life without it. Ahh, yeah right. The gifts she got me, I can't even remeber and hers, well, it was returned to the store a few days later because she had never wanted it to begin with. But, it was our first really special holiday together and it will always be the most special time I will remember.
I apologive for not calling you or Rex, but I'm never sure what to say. God knows I've thought about calling you guys a hundred times. I think about you, A-Rex and Rex everyday. I hope you and August decide to stick around Oklahoma for awhile and maybe discover a little more about Jeff that you didn't know.
Hope to see you guys soon,
Tyson
Monday, September 24, 2007
Pardon My Silence
Hey all. Sorry I haven't been better about posting - I just wanted to drop a quick line in the middle of the work day saying that the picture DVDs are in progress. If you don't think you gave me your mailing address, send it along my way.
No real new news on my end other than that. I'll try to be better about posting (ahem, Tyson).
One more thing - While Jeff was recovering from brain surgery and later while dealing with the effects of full brain radiation, he told me about how much he enjoyed getting up in the morning to go running (or walking when the disease was progressing). I've started getting up to run first thing in the morning and, for those of you that know me, that's a big step for me. I'm not exactly a morning person.
I've run a couple of marathons here and there, but rarely with motivation beyond doing it to prove something to myself. I would like to start training for another one, this time in memory of my lifelong friend and with the purpose of raising money for cancer research. I haven't picked out a date or location yet, but if any of you are interested in joining me let me know. My aim is for sometime next Spring. Every marathon that I've ever heard of (with the exception of Boston) also organizes a half marathon on the same day, so don't be scared of the full 26.2 miles.
My goal this time is 3h 10min and I'm going to run for Jeff. If any of you want to join in and help me make a decision on where to run it, I'd love some training partners.
No real new news on my end other than that. I'll try to be better about posting (ahem, Tyson).
One more thing - While Jeff was recovering from brain surgery and later while dealing with the effects of full brain radiation, he told me about how much he enjoyed getting up in the morning to go running (or walking when the disease was progressing). I've started getting up to run first thing in the morning and, for those of you that know me, that's a big step for me. I'm not exactly a morning person.
I've run a couple of marathons here and there, but rarely with motivation beyond doing it to prove something to myself. I would like to start training for another one, this time in memory of my lifelong friend and with the purpose of raising money for cancer research. I haven't picked out a date or location yet, but if any of you are interested in joining me let me know. My aim is for sometime next Spring. Every marathon that I've ever heard of (with the exception of Boston) also organizes a half marathon on the same day, so don't be scared of the full 26.2 miles.
My goal this time is 3h 10min and I'm going to run for Jeff. If any of you want to join in and help me make a decision on where to run it, I'd love some training partners.
Friday, September 21, 2007
jefe in nyc
i was fortunate enough to have the pleasure of jeffs companionship in new york for a good while. i remember getting a call from him, out of the blue one day. that conversation evolved into one of the happiest days of my later years to date. jeff told me he was thinking about moving to new york after graduating from boulder. i was so excited to have him ( after a good ten years of living in different states) back in my life.
well, before i could blink, it seems, he visited a couple of times and then living in a swanky part of lower mid town in his own place. which was quite an interesting work of fate for that matter.
before leaving boulder he was bartending and had a regular in one day and they were talking about his move out to new york. jeff had already been out there looking at apts. and as you all know, it aint cheap. turns out this guy ( who happened to be the inventor of the "wrist rocket sling shot") had an apt. in manhattan, on 23rd and park ave. (not to shabby) he still kept and only visited one week out of the year.
well, there you go. problem solved. enter jeff, stage right,(east coast) into swank one bedroom apt. nyc. we had a hell of a time in that place. for how long i cant quite recall. ill have to think some more on that one.
wanted to share that little bit cause it just shows how jeff always seemed to touch everyone he met. even enough for a regular guy, drinking in his bar, to just hand over his keys and give him quite the break on the rent. (even though that was still pretty high)
more to come. all my love from salt lake city,
tommy
well, before i could blink, it seems, he visited a couple of times and then living in a swanky part of lower mid town in his own place. which was quite an interesting work of fate for that matter.
before leaving boulder he was bartending and had a regular in one day and they were talking about his move out to new york. jeff had already been out there looking at apts. and as you all know, it aint cheap. turns out this guy ( who happened to be the inventor of the "wrist rocket sling shot") had an apt. in manhattan, on 23rd and park ave. (not to shabby) he still kept and only visited one week out of the year.
well, there you go. problem solved. enter jeff, stage right,(east coast) into swank one bedroom apt. nyc. we had a hell of a time in that place. for how long i cant quite recall. ill have to think some more on that one.
wanted to share that little bit cause it just shows how jeff always seemed to touch everyone he met. even enough for a regular guy, drinking in his bar, to just hand over his keys and give him quite the break on the rent. (even though that was still pretty high)
more to come. all my love from salt lake city,
tommy
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Beaver Creek!
Hi guys,
So here is your first save the date for a memorial/celebration of one of Jeff's favorite things, snowboarding. Yipee!
So, December 1-8th. That's it. Mark your calendars. Be there. Details to follow.
So here is your first save the date for a memorial/celebration of one of Jeff's favorite things, snowboarding. Yipee!
So, December 1-8th. That's it. Mark your calendars. Be there. Details to follow.
Monday, September 17, 2007
Tyson is a mind reader
I was just thinking about the blog this morning - thanks Tyson for expressing what I was thinking! We started this blog so everyone could stay in better touch (and so that Tyson would have more people to take money from in poker). Also, we were talking about trying to get a repository of stories together so that we can put memories of Jeff together for Augustine (and for Sarah). So let's start sharing!
One of the earliest memories I can salvage was being a 7th grader at John Carroll, so Jeff would have been in 4th grade. It was scandalous that he was dating an 8th grader! Jefe was a studmuffin from a very early age. :-) Of course, my prude class looked down on it, but now I realize that Jeff was wise beyond his years from the very beginning. More on that in future posts/memories.
One of the earliest memories I can salvage was being a 7th grader at John Carroll, so Jeff would have been in 4th grade. It was scandalous that he was dating an 8th grader! Jefe was a studmuffin from a very early age. :-) Of course, my prude class looked down on it, but now I realize that Jeff was wise beyond his years from the very beginning. More on that in future posts/memories.
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Just a Quickie
There are quite a few of you out there that either have not posted or left a comment. One of the reasons we created this blog was to stay in better contact with each other, so I expect to see some quality posts from you slackers. The other things is that there are a few people on here (April Waggoner, Leve and Denise & Mariano) that I have no idea who you are. Would you please introduce yourselves and share with us how you were friends with Jeff. The rest of us would be very interested in knowing a few juicy stories from Jeff's experiences in the later part of his life. I also might feel more comfortable in giving you a hard time as well.
Tyson
Tyson
Monday, September 10, 2007
thanks everyoue
i cannot begin to express how deeply moved i was to witness the multitude of friends and family that dropped everything they must have had going on in their lives to pay homage to a great cousin and even greater friend. im in salt lake city right now working and constantly staring up at the mountains out here thinking of jeff. thanks to harmon and whoever else that made the arduous trek to put jeff where he wanted to be, his final resting place. it was wonderful nto see so many friendly faces, i love you all. tyson, ill call about the online poker. it sounds like fun. r.i.p.j.,
tommy
tommy
Monday, September 3, 2007
Back in Sydney
Well, I arrived back in Sydney a few days ago, and I'm now back at work. Unfortunately, my return trip coincides with the start of APEC :-/, which is causing massive disruptions to Sydney. Oh well, what are you going to do? The good news is that we get Friday off as a public holiday, but this is only a small compensation.
While it was wonderful seeing everyone at home, it was great to return home to my family (however, it should be noted that I did not return in time to go to the Ice Cube concert :-(). A big thanks goes to my beautiful partner, Sarah, for being so patient and understanding while I was away. You rule, babe. It's also been great seeing Xavier again. He's been wonderfully loving and affectionate since I have returned (not that he wasn't before, but even more so since my return). Here's a photo of my two super heroes:
Which reminds me, we're going to see Il Trittico at the Sydney Opera House. I love going to the Opera House, and Sarah loves Puccini, so it should be a wonderful night.
Take care all! I should get to work before I get fired!
While it was wonderful seeing everyone at home, it was great to return home to my family (however, it should be noted that I did not return in time to go to the Ice Cube concert :-(). A big thanks goes to my beautiful partner, Sarah, for being so patient and understanding while I was away. You rule, babe. It's also been great seeing Xavier again. He's been wonderfully loving and affectionate since I have returned (not that he wasn't before, but even more so since my return). Here's a photo of my two super heroes:
Which reminds me, we're going to see Il Trittico at the Sydney Opera House. I love going to the Opera House, and Sarah loves Puccini, so it should be a wonderful night.
Take care all! I should get to work before I get fired!
Friday, August 31, 2007
Light
I'm sure I could never find the words or sentiment to express what we've all been experiencing lately - but I want it to be known that Jeff has had an amazing effect on us and reunited us in such a way that I was truly not prepared for. I feel very lucky to have been a part of the reunion he created for us - and the the thoughts and tears that we have all been bombarded with will continue to keep him alive through all of us. We were honored to have been a part of his life, and now it's our turn to honor him through all of these wonderful memories that I know we have all been reliving. Thank you to all of you - especially Travis - for organizing and including and communicating in the outstanding way that you have. I am in awe of your grace and commitment to Jeff's infectious spirit. Let us all remember to keep his light alive and at the forefront of our minds - where he will always belong.
Much Love,
Erica
Much Love,
Erica
mount massive
Well my friends, I am in the process of packing for an undertaking dedicated to Jeff this weekend. Myself and several friends will be heading to Mount Massive here in Colorado on Sunday morning. For those of you that not aware, this is the 2nd highest peak in Colorado. We are looking at approx. 14 miles and an elevation of 14,421'. As many of you may have noticed, i am certainly not in peak condition but this is a dedication to Jeff so it will happen. I will attach photos so you can see what this magnificent peak is all about. In the mean time, for your viewing pleasure, here is a web site that gives you the idea of the task at hand. http://www.aroundcolorado.com/trip_reports/2004_0918_Massive/index.html
My intentions are simple. I will bust my ass to summit and say good by to a friend that i was honored to know. Jeff was my best friend and not having the proper chance to say good by broke my heart ten ways to Sunday. I hope this will provide me and those of you joining me in your thoughts the chance to say good by. I cant cry myself to sleep any longer and need this closure as im sure many of you may need as well. I will update when I have returned safely. Till then, all my love
Michael D. Harmon
My intentions are simple. I will bust my ass to summit and say good by to a friend that i was honored to know. Jeff was my best friend and not having the proper chance to say good by broke my heart ten ways to Sunday. I hope this will provide me and those of you joining me in your thoughts the chance to say good by. I cant cry myself to sleep any longer and need this closure as im sure many of you may need as well. I will update when I have returned safely. Till then, all my love
Michael D. Harmon
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Thanks Travis and ALL the McCaffree's
Well.....I guess Travis is heading back to Aussie today. I know I've said it a hundred times but, thank you Travis for all that you gave up to be with Jeff and Sarah and keeping us well informed in the "special" way that you have. And by "special" I mean "special ed". Let us know when you get back.
A big thanks needs to go out to the Drs. McCaffree, Matt and Sara. You all are always there for all of us. And thank you Lilia for putting up with questions that were wildly inappropriate.
Tyson
A big thanks needs to go out to the Drs. McCaffree, Matt and Sara. You all are always there for all of us. And thank you Lilia for putting up with questions that were wildly inappropriate.
Tyson
Monday, August 27, 2007
Hello all
Just a quick hello posting to the friends that join. As of Monday, August 27, 2007 (full lunar eclipse tonight!), I'm still in OKC. I just had dinner with the Drs McCaffree, which was lovely as always.
I hope all is well with everyone!
Much love,
Travis
I hope all is well with everyone!
Much love,
Travis
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